Eagles Over the Kennebec

Those who have been playing along at home will recall that Maine recently allowed as how gay people are human, too, and ought to be able to partake of all the rights and responsibilities attendant to that state. This, of course, brought a whole buncha Right Thinking People out of the woodwork in opposition, and from countries as far away as New Jersey and Colorado.

The Right Thinking People have raised just oodles of money in defense of my marriage, which I don't recall EVER asking them to defend. It's a good marriage; it has its twitters and tangles, like anyybody's marriage, but it's not endangered or threatened in any way. Especially not by other people getting married.

But, I digress. This article talks about the various fund raising efforts of the Right Thinking People and Those Other People and it comes to light that, along with funds flowing in-state from Planet Jersey and the nice folks at Focus on the Family, $100,000 has been donated by...

...wait for it...

...deep breath...

No, deeper...

The Portland Roman Catholic Diocese.

So, Momma Church is paying taxes now, is she?

I usually tell people not to ship me stuff by FedEx Ground. This is why:

1. The very first thing that was sent to me by FedEx Ground was a Special Gift for Steve -- a key-driven wall clock with Westminster chimes that he had only been lusting after, at that point, for a quarter of a century. FedEx Ground in Lewiston, Maine apportioned it to a driver (they use freelancers in these parts) who Did Not Believe in Waterville. He delayed delivery for more than a week, and when the clock finally did arrive, after I called the vendor to solicit their assistance in getting the delivery finalized, it was smashed into two hundred pieces.

2. The next time, the package was left on some random porch in Albion. No, I don't know why. Happily tney were honest folk at that place, and I was able to recover our goods.

3. The third time, there was a snowstorm and the driver didn't want to drive out a country road in the admittedly risky conditions. Fair enough. But! Instead of letting his manager know that the weather was too bad to continue driving, he logged the item as delivered.

4. Which brings us to today. Two rather large and substantial packages, which I very much desire to have, are reported as "delivered 12:10; left on porch." Which is an Utter Fabrication. I called FedEx Customer Service, who put in a tracing request and a Dispute of Delivery. The manager of the Lewiston facility is supposed to call me, today, tomorrow, whenever. In the meantime, my packages are Ghod Knows Where and I am Just Infuriated.

Die, FedEx Ground. Die!

Edited to add: My packages are at my neighbor's house (over there, see? Right at the top of that long drive? Up on the crest of the hill?), where there's work being done, and a helpful contractor brought them inside. The Mrs. has volunteered Himself to schlepp them down for me when he gets home. Good neighbors.

Die, FedEx Ground. Die!